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  What's in a Name ?

Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS

Just cause 'they' had a baby, ‘I'm’ a generation older?!  

But they say it's worth the jump! The kid is like one minute old and everyone is asking me how it feels. It feels like my son and daughter (in law) had a baby. I'm ecstatic for them. I think the kid is delicious. But, how it will actually play out to be a grandparent, now that I think I need some time to discover.   Yes -it feels like my son had a baby. Yes-That's wild. I see him already doting, and fussing, and smiling with pride from ear to ear. I see her rediscovering that her legs actually do exist, and yes that it's worth going through all 'that' to get this. And I see her processing that no one can appreciate this "much described indescribable experience", till you go through it yourself! And I see her being, the caring, wonderful, person she is to my son, to her daughter. But me, I think I’m still just me, so far!  

People are asking me what I'm going to be called. Why-do they have some inside information about how exceptional this baby is (which she is) - in other words that she'll be speaking any time soon?! Alternatively, do they need to know because they are planning to address me by my new grandparent name? I think I have some time to decide on my new title. In the interim everyone is invited to continue to call me by the usual accolades I am used to like, hey gorgeous, amazing, etc.  

I am certainly looking forward to the experience ahead. I can completely imagine it will be wonderful i"h to have this new type of relationship but so far she's called me nothing!  Though I have called her every special adjective in the book, from, sweet, glowing, and delicious to obviously great natured and extremely advanced. 

Now, on the other hand, has the young couple's life changed already? Oh yes, that's a different story. That happens within the first few minutes after giving birth. Like when everyone leaves the room the first time and they look at each other wondering, wait who'd they leave in here to take care of that baby?! 

And then there's the experience of leaving the hospital.....These 2 energetic , proficient, on the move, young adults, have turned in 2, slow moving, bag ladies. They need to check twenty times that they took everything- including the newborn!  And though they came in with a small overnight bag, completely, optimistically, over packed with blow dryer and lovely robe, that they never had the energy to access, they are leaving with half the nursery supplies in tow.

 They walked in a simple couple but left as a family. 

The kid takes up like no space in the apartment. 21 more inches maybe, basically little more than the size of a two liter coke bottle.  But, with the paraphernalia they come with today they need to start thinking of buying a house, just for their stuff!  

Everyone comes to see the new arrival and everyone asks me so how does it feel? Did I kvetch this child out, labor for hours, push my guts out?! Why are they asking me?!  My friends call me and say welcome to the club. I'm sure they'll be sending me a membership bill in the mail. It's too suspicious; no entry was ever this easy.  

We all have a vision of a grandparent from years ago and that was an elderly, European, little woman. Not a young, at least in my mind, cosmopolitan, fast paced, woman (Though now I realize they felt as young as ever back then too).  Still, I'm expecting to shrink any minute and to start spewing yiddishisms! 

Ok I'll share a secret with you -Here are titles I've considered. Mom, Mommy, Ma, but I can't figure out what my daughter in law would be called in that case. And since she is the one willing to accept all the responsibilities that come with that title, I know I have to find some other description for myself. My husband wants to be called "pops" and since I'm his other half I'm thinking I have to be called "lolly"! I kind of liked eemee but he doesn't want to be ahbee. So, for now I guess I'll just let the kid keep thinking what she's thinking when she sees me, you know -"how did I get so lucky?! ".  And the wisdom of who I should be to this little angel, model, genius, (objectively speaking), will come to me! For now I think she can continue calling me what she's calling everyone else...... Wa wa wa!

Which I suspiciously think in my case is the start of the word (wa)....for wonderful!

Rivki Rosenwald is a certified relationship counselor, and career and life coach. She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivki@rosenwalds.com<mailto:rivki@rosenwalds.com

 

 

 

5 Common Parenting Mistakes

By: Slovie Jungreis Wolf

Here are five of the most common mistakes parents make. With more awareness, we can work on avoiding them.

1. Bubble-Wrapping Kids

Children require independence to flourish. They need to write and rewrite reports, stay up studying and use their time wisely, work on science projects, and earn their A’s and B’s. The moments they fail a test, strike out in a baseball game, don’t get the part in the production or are unhappy with the class they were placed in are opportunities for growth. It’s okay for them to struggle, figure out how to do better next time and open hearts to people they’d never normally sit with at the lunch table in school.

Children need to fall in order to learn how to get up and stand on their own two feet. We can't protect them from pain, disappointment and rejection. The more we try the less they can handle. They need to learn how to cope.

Self-esteem comes from discovering their inner strengths and knowing that "I can do this", "I will not fall apart."

2. Weak Discipline

All children require discipline to understand standards of behavior and learn self-control, especially today.

But we make the mistake of believing that discipline means punishment and negativity. Some parents are afraid that saying ‘no’ will push children away. Not true.

Good discipline means that I don’t wait for the problems to arise. Instead I have created a bond with my kids, we communicate well, I am present, they know what is expected and accepted. When they run off course (all children will at some time make mistakes or test us), I do not ignore the problem, yell, become overly emotional, hit, or put my children down. Instead I use natural and clear consequences, remain calm but strong, take the time to listen, and teach my children to take responsibility for their actions. I approach the relationship with a positive spirit and try my best to be present in my children’s lives to show that I care.

Problems occur if kids see that we don’t carry through, are not serious about our standards, are inconsistent, or believe that screaming means discipline.

Too many times we say ‘no’ but convey ‘maybe’ or ‘I’m not sure,’ which breeds confusion. They read our hesitation and pounce on our doubt. If I believe in myself, am consistent, clear, stand firm in my parenting standards, and balance discipline with loving times spent together, my ability to discipline becomes strengthened.

3. Fearing Unhappiness

What do you want for your children?

The most common response I get to this question is: "I just want them to be happy."

If this is your reply, it becomes easy to fall into the "happiness trap." We keep buying, look away at bad behavior, overindulge and go against our better judgment all in the name of happiness. We confuse the idea of loving children with constantly doing for them and making them happy.

Happy children is not our ultimate parenting goal. Good character, grit, resilience, sensitivity, honesty, respect, strong work ethics, and high values are all part of our mission. There will be times that our children will be unhappy despite our best intentions. They will get upset with our decisions. But sometimes the answer is no. As hard as we try we will encounter their tears. This does not mean that we are bad parents. It means we are doing our job and teaching our children that they can’t always have everything they want. Life holds disappointments. Growing desperate for approval and children’s smiles denies us the power to parent with purpose.

4. Peter Pan Parenting

Children need role models. Where should they learn responsibility, spirituality, compassion, respect and priorities if not from their parents?

Sadly, there are mothers and fathers who don’t want to grow up. They still want to dress, drink, party, speak and act like they did before having children. Responsibilities feel choking, hindering their freedom. Life does not feel fun anymore. Like Peter Pan, they want to remain in Neverland.

With parenting comes responsibility. We are not our children’s BFF’s. We cannot expect more from our kids than we expect from ourselves.

5. Forgetting to Show Love as Kids Grow

It’s easy to show love to an infant. We cuddle, kiss, hug and sing lullabies. They climb on our laps and we wipe away their tears. But what happens as they grow?

We give orders more and show love less. We forget to say "I love you." We don’t connect as easily. They are in their world and we in ours. We get lost in our phones, Instagram and daily pressures. We stop laughing and sharing conversation. Talks are usually reserved for misbehavior, admonishment, and asking if they took a shower and did their homework.

We realize too late that we’ve left words unsaid and wonder how many more hugs and kisses could have been given to nourish a hungry soul.

Decide today that no matter how busy you are or complicated life has gotten, you will not allow another day to go by without communicating love to each child.

Children are a precious gift. Let’s take the time to cultivate souls, nourish hearts, build character and create a path for the next generation. Believe in yourself as a parent. What an incredible mission we have.

 

 

What's Worth Talking About ?

Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS

There's a tradition or a or myth that says you have a certain number of words to use up, and then you are gone. So my advice is stop talking about the weather!!   

It is here to sabotage us!  Especially this year. Could it be more erratic? In fact, though I'm writing this, my advice is - do not read it out loud!!!  (Because then of course, you'll use up more words talking about the undependable weather again!!! 

It's like oh my gosh, global warming one day and global freezing the next! My car is already seeing a therapist. A/C, Heat, A/C, Heat. The up and downs are freaking my motor out! 

And forget about my wardrobe! Summer clothes up to the attic, down, up, down.  But- then again, it's actually saving me a fortune. I've suspended my gym membership. Who needs the gym's stair master when I'm mastering mine?! 

My husband called last week from LA saying he was freezing. My friend called from Florida from her "holiday vacation” saying they're still hoping the sun will come out. But hey, me, I said "sorry, can’t talk now, I'm in NY, I'm on my way to the beach"!  Now this week -that's a different story! Oh no - I'm still not available to talk.  But, that's because I'm back on the stairs schlepping the summer clothes up and the winter stuff back down.  

Now can we talk about the flu season?  I don't think it's flying by so fast! Batabom!!!  

People are discussing a mild winter. That's an optimist for you. I'm more of a Jewish time proponent.... After being exposed to us for so long, the winter is just showing up late! 

After all I don't expect it to be a "snow show"! Batabom!!  

Winter probably still has a lot of gusto under its belt. I'm envisioning skiing to the bus stop as we drop our kids off for camp. But you know how parents are, they hate to see their kids go off to camp. They are sobbing and heartbroken at the "bus sendoff spot".  Maybe this will keep them from delivering their kids there. Yet my prediction, is even an avalanche, won't stop them from getting them to the bus stop. Nothing has in the past! The parent sobbing is part of the ritual, keeping them home is not!  

Oh and listen to this here is the newest release of the top ten songs out now. I'm dreaming of a white Purim. Batabom!!!  

Autumn automatically turned right back into summer. And finally we are noticing winter beginning to spring upon us. One would have thought by now, they would have been seasoned experts in showing up at their designated times.  

We certainly do have starting dates attributed to each season. Why don't they respect them? How insensitive would it be to be announced somewhere you were expected, and then you totally didn’t make an appearance for days?  You'd be pretty apologetic. But hey, no explanations from the seasons, they kind of seem to be running hot and cold!  

I wake up each morning now hoping we'll have another bout of summer and simultaneously wishing winter could start already so it can end already! Does that resonate with you?!  

Sure I'm confused. But what New Yorker isn't?!  Oh and then there's the weather issue bewildering me to boot!!!  Batabom! 

Yes life doesn't always deliver us what we are expecting. And surely, there are more pressing concerns than the weather. There are a lot of challenges to confront and struggles to surmount.  

But I can't even talk about them cause I just don't want to use up more words!!!!  And want to be around for the better days. 

So what do I do? I say, Gd's got it covered.  I can't change the weather by talking about it, I can only accept it and outfit myself right. And that is how I need to get through the challenges as well. Find the right tools to make it through. And be ready and available for when the wind shifts and the good times begin to rain down! 

Now that, if anything, is something to talk about!!!! Batabom!!!

 Rivki Rosenwald is a certified relationship counselor, and career and life coach. She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivki@rosenwalds.com<mailto:rivki@rosenwalds.com 

 

5 Ways to Make Peace with Your Family 
by  
How to get through those painful family gatherings.

 

This is the time of year that many families spend time together. College students trek home, couples return with their kids, single adults walk through the door again and grandparents often travel to spend time with children and grandchildren they haven’t seen for a while. Whether it’s an extended family holiday vacation or parents and their kids getting together, these times often breed conflict.

There are always those who anticipate great family time but come away feeling disappointment. Some nurse emotional wounds and hurtful exchanges. Others feel overlooked and misunderstood. Many scratch their heads and wonder, Is this really my family? Some vow not return next year, feeling as if they simply don’t belong.

You can be accomplished, talented and respected but then you sit at this gathering feeling belittled and misjudged, as if you’re back in high school.

Here are some empowering tips that can help you get through the most difficult family get together.

1. Prepare for a Spiritual Workout

Come into the situation knowing it’s time to grow. Think to yourself: I can do this by being brave and accepting certain family realities and dynamics. I cannot change people. I can only change my reaction to those who continue to aggravate and annoy me. Once I accept this, my next step is to move on.

Ask: what is my spiritual goal here? If I’d be in the gym, I’d be sweating and exerting myself even if it means feeling discomfort or pain. The same goes for my internal self. If I want to reach a place of compassion, patience, forgiveness, and not reacting to every slight then I must step out of my comfort zone. For the first time I will finally reach serenity.

Of course it’s easy to feel good with easy going people whom I like and get along with. But what happens when I am together with those who push my buttons?

See irritating people as opportunities to lose those pesky extra spiritual pounds you’ve been lugging around. Ridding yourself of angry reactions, being snappy, and freezing yourself out of the conversation will strengthen your internal character muscles. Instead of falling prey to your negative emotions, rise above them and stand on the legs of dignity and self-respect.

2. Be a First Responder

You know what to expect: “So, you’re still not married?” “Did you ever look into getting a better paying job?” “Those pounds never came off, huh?” “Why are your kids always so wild?”

You know that you won’t be changing people’s minds about how they see you and your world. So why get into heated conversations or retreat to stony silence?

First responders come prepared. They don’t search for supplies or wonder what to do. They are cool and calm. They have adequate oxygen and are sure to avoid lethal air. Take their lead. Decide on your best response before the exchange happens and stick with it. But be sure to lose the sarcasm or biting defensive replies. Avoid toxic exchanges. You only end up hurting yourself. If you need to, take a breath and collect yourself.

You can use humor or manipulate the conversation to another direction. Prepare yourself and think of how you’d like to reply with grace. Saying things like: “I know my kids are lively, they keep me going” or “When I find my soulmate I’ll be giving you a call for sure. Thanks for always caring” are alternatives to heated exchanges. Try to give a smile.

3. Replace Anger with Pity

Instead of filling your heart with rage, try a new emotion: pity.

Feel sorry for this person who causes pain and distance from others. Feel sad for this individual who cannot allow himself to enjoy the blessing of family. This person is either insecure or hardened, so they push others down to feel better about themselves. Perhaps they went through pain or difficulty which caused them to grow a hardened shell. No matter the reason, bottom line is they are the ones losing out on the joy. Walking around always ready to do battle is an awful way to live. Fighting gear is heavy and cumbersome. It weighs you down. Who wants to be that person? Change your lens. See this irksome individual through eyes of pity and be grateful that this is not the way you live.

4. Be a Peace Leader

Become a force for change. Ask yourself: How can I inject warmth and love into this situation?

If there is someone who feels as you do, engage them. This is one who is easy to speak with, you feel comfortable with, and you don’t feel apprehensive of. Try to place yourself near this person.

Remove yourself from gossip and malicious talk.

Steer the conversation away from judgmental and heated discussions.

Lighten the mood by putting together cherished family memories in an album or think of a family game that can fill the room with activity and laughter instead of hurtful conversation.

Pay attention to others who may be feeling badly or out of the family circle. Give them extra attention.

5. Forgive

Perhaps the past may have brought harsh encounters with parents or fights with siblings. Listen carefully. Years have passed. People go through unexpected challenges never believing that this is where life has taken them. The difficult road was not in the plans and we are not always proud of the way we have journeyed or handled the pressures of dark times. Looking back, parents and children may feel ashamed of acrid words spit out or thoughtless actions done. Pushed to rage by stress is of course no excuse but there comes a moment in time where we must decide to move on.

We will not have our family forever. Open your heart to a parent who has aged, a sibling whose life has been shamed, and a child who has dealt with unexpected blows. Struggles and disappointments take us down an unexpected path. No one is immune.

If you are willing to forgive you will not feel regret when this person passes away. Let me be very clear: this is not a license to accept abuse. Rather, allow yourself to move on by letting go of the past and tapping into the generosity of spirit that lies within your soul. Use this time together to shed the battle gear and at the very least stop the antagonism. Find a smile or good word to offer, be kind, and become the better person you’ve always strived to be. Respond with integrity, not weakness. Don’t live life carrying the weight of bearing a grudge.

When family is fractured, warmth and peace are replaced with sadness and bitterness. Seize the moment to teach your children the definition of loyalty, laughter, bonding time and cherished memories. The longer you hold onto old hurts and cycles of pain, the longer it will take to heal. This year build bridges with your family. It’s time.



 

 

A Night Verses A Lifetime

Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS 

Invite everyone you know- no keep it small? 

Have the beautiful view of the water- no the bigger dance floor?   Use the caterer with a flare -no -the less expensive caterer!  These are some of the struggles, and yes, even arguments you go through planning a wedding and that's before you even get the other family involved! You and your child are slugging out the details and then you still have to deal with the other side!  

So how does it all get resolved? Ah my friends that is the very question that families, young couples, and the Magi themselves have been asking for centuries? 

Clearly it usually all does work out, because the invitations do go out. And all the guests, or maybe only the ones who made the negotiated cut off, are there at the wedding to celebrate. 

Is it stressful? It could be! It depends on how it all goes down! If you are blessed, you can keep your eye on the endpoint- A couple is starting their lives together. This is only one night, albeit an important one! But if the flower arrangements, the band, or the locale are more important than the families having harmony, oh yeah things can get sticky or rather more appropriately, repellent. 

Is there a formula to abide by to keep things healthy and balanced?

I guess prayer would be my first suggestion. Pray that you have the self-control to back off from all that you want. Use a sharp memory would be my second suggestion.  Remember everything you need for life you learned in kindergarten, "you get what you get and you don't get upset".  Remember your sports lessons "it's not whether you win or lose it’s how you play the game". Remember what free choice means, we don't control the challenges presented to us only how we respond to them. Do you see a pattern developing here?!

 Most importantly, make an eye doctor's appointment. Try to get rose colored glasses in order to see everything in a positive light. 

Many parties have envisioned this day. Unfortunately, all differently!! 

 So far there are no Mediators pursuing the career of wedding negotiator. That might be an idea for party planners to add to their skill set. Kind of like a good matchmaker, they can fudge the sentiments a little, to help things move forward successfully.  

Marriage is all about compromise. Why isn't this as good a time as any to start modeling it?! 

This is not a boxing match. The ring used is not one where everyone climbs in together; rather it’s worn to commemorate love.  The money exchanged by the attendants at the event is not for betting on the outcome; rather it’s to support a positive one.  The parties are not returning to separate corners; they are marching off together to the same one. The towel is not being thrown in its being monogrammed with both their names. And the winner is not one or the other, it's the union! 

The best way to make it all work out despite the many parties and opinions at play is to remember:

The food ordered is gone that night, in seconds, with each swallow.

The clothing worn gets discarded the next day relegated to the attic or the depths of the closet.

The band is on to another event, the very next night.

And within the week the flowers die.

But the couple and their families need to survive a lifetime together. Is whether a kanadal was served verses a crepe, a rose used verses a carnation, a bassoon played verses a violin, or the color sage worn verses burgundy, worth a battle that effects a lifetime of shared births, bar mitzvahs, graduations, anniversaries and so much more? 

This is what you need to keep in mind as you sit down to negotiate a wedding. It's a night verses a lifetime.  I bet there have been times you've fallen asleep early and missed out on a night, not always one you wanted to miss, but at least it's just one night.  You certainly would never want to miss out on a whole life time!   

Rivki Rosenwald is a certified relationship counselor, and career and life coach. She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivki@rosenwalds.com<mailto:rivki@rosenwalds.com

 

 

Despair and Hope in Israel 
by  
Hanukkah reminds us that we have the power to repel the darkness with light.

Feel the darkness surround me. We are tired of the cruel murders; the savage shootings, the car ramming’s and barbaric stabbings. As I write, the funeral of Ezra Schwartz is coming to its final moments. I pray that by the time you read these words there will not be fresh names for us to mourn. Meanwhile, I watch Ezra’s siblings cry for a brother who watched over them, filled their home with laughter, taught them how to live and now, transmitted his final lesson that life is fragile and precious. The Jewish people grieve a spirited soul who wanted to study more Torah, grow in kindness and give back to our land.

My computer screen goes dark and I feel hot tears rush down my cheeks. A beautiful face pops up on my phone and I see the next Jewish child who has been taken. Hadar Buchris, 21, “a charming girl, radiant and friendly, her energy always managed to wake everyone up.” Stabbed to death, she too leaves this world as one whose only crime was to walk this earth as a Jew.

The deafening silence of the world astounds us. Our people are being murdered and they are busy labeling Israeli food on their shelves. Why do they not shout out for the Henkins, whose innocent children witnessed their parents being slaughtered? Where are the angry calls for justice, the marches for respect of human life and dignity? How can one turn their back on Rabbi Yaakov Litman and his son Netanel who were driving to celebrate the Shabbat of their daughter’s groom? Now, they too are tragically gone. Can it be that a father and son are brutishly murdered in front of their family and leaders of the world remain voiceless? How has humanity gone mute?

Too many have been lost. The ink is barely dry and then another name appears. Fathers and mothers who will never again kiss their children good night. Young girls and boys who will never walk to their chuppah and stand under its canopy in love. Grandparents who will never cradle babies they have dreamed of; their lullabies remain unsung.

Darkness & Forgetting

And as the days fade I am afraid of us forgetting. We are obligated to see what is happening around us and recall each individual tragedy. Every person who has gone has a story to tell. Each is a world that has been snuffed out, snatched from the arms of loved ones. As long as we remember each face, each name, each soul, we deny those who wish to extinguish their light.

The Hebrew word for ‘forget’(shachach) contains the same letters as the word for ‘darkness’(choshech). Because it is when we forget that we sit in darkness. The opposite of darkness is light which helps us see and remember. This is the message of the menorah – that to cast away the darkness we must hold on to our sacred memory and not lose the light of legacy. We are asked to take the time, gaze into the menorah’s fire and relive its timeless message.

The light of Hanukkah is coming. These holy lights remind us of our story, the miracle of the Jewish nation. We recall how the Greeks tried to destroy our people, outlaw the study of Torah, and impose their beliefs upon the land of Israel. They wanted us to abandon our faith. They caused great anguish and oppressed us with their harsh decrees. Many felt hopeless. They are so many and we are so few. What will be?

The Greeks entered our holy Temple and defiled all the oil used for lighting the Menorah. Outraged by the desecration and torment, a group banded together to restore Israel’s glory. Led by Judah, son of Matisyahu from the family of Chashmonaim, five bold brothers called out to the nation. Emblazoned on Judah’s flag was Maccabee – an acronym for ‘Mi Camocha Ba’eilim Hashem’, words taken from our holy Torah recognizing the awesomeness of God. More than just a physical battle, this became a spiritual contest. Drawing upon their courage a great miracle occurred and the darkness was repelled. Our people, though smaller in number, endured.

When the Jews entered the sanctuary they saw incredible destruction. They decided to rebuild, repair and rededicate. Realizing that there was an inadequate amount of pure olive oil to light the menorah beyond just one day, the Chashmonaim would not surrender to despair. The Menorah was lit. The small flask of undefiled oil remained burning for eight days. And through its light we once again tapped in to the miraculous journey of our people.

Maccabees Today

Our journey continues until today. When the world believes that they have broken our spirit, that there is not sufficient oil to kindle our inner light, we find that hidden spark and reignite the fire within. Wherever we may be in the world we place our menorahs facing the window to openly proclaim the miracle of our nation. The love between Israel and God will not be lost.

Now is not a time to give in to despair. The Maccabees endowed us with the courage to stand up for our people. We cannot give up; we cannot give in to the madness that surrounds us. Just as the Maccabees courageously rebuilt and rededicated, so too must we take their timeless lessons to heart. Especially when we feel overwhelmed with the destruction that surrounds us.

Each of us has the ability to kindle a light, to become a Maccabee. A little bit of light pushes away the darkness. Too many despair and give up when feeling as if there is overwhelming devastation. We wonder what we can possibly do. Hanukkah becomes our opportunity to rededicate. We search for our personal flask of oil, discover our inner spark and illuminate the world around us. For some it is a rededication to Torah study revealing the power of faith. This holiday is a celebration for families. Parents can use this time to inspire children to find joy in their Judaism.

Our college youth should be encouraged to discover more about our glorious heritage and beautiful rituals. Faced with growing anti-Semitism, knowledge empowers them to stand proud as Jews and be passionate for our people. For others, we draw upon our courage and extend ourselves by taking a step toward rebuilding a marriage, repairing a frayed relationship or friendship. This too requires bravery and strengthens our nation with unity. We cannot afford to be splintered.

The miracle begins when we decide, like the Maccabees, to cast aside the emotions of discouragement and search for our ability to create light. Even if that light seems small, remember that just a single spark can ignite a fire. Never give up. We will endure.

 

 

Are You A Pretzel?

Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS                      

A complete stranger is practically lying in my lap. My feet are suspended over his or her head. After all, where else am I going to put them? I've got earplugs in my ears, an eye mask over my eyes and yet sleep completely alludes me. I call out, "anyone have a Xanax"? About 55 nervous looking types are responding all at once, how many do you need? I only want to sleep through this flight not through my life! 

With all the brilliance of air travel, we can actually be half way across the world in no time, still they haven't figured out how to make it more comfortable. Or could they? The luggage has more space than the passengers. I guess it must be all about getting people to pay for first class. That's probably how they keep prices down for everyone else and therefore I get it. But still is there no other solution?  

I've been tempted to pack myself in a ski bag. Though I hear it's freezing in the cargo. But it would be fine, I'd just wear more layers and pack less. And think of the advantages.  It gives you full length to spread out. You get carried everywhere. You're already positioned for a nap. At the end of the flight you get driven right to baggage pick up, no schlepping through the airport.  And you get a free ride on a carousel till your family comes to pick you up.  

Of course a family might look funny toting a couple of ski bags to Miami or the Caribbean. But it could come in handy if you want to bring along some golf clubs or a fishing rod. Though you need to stand clear of the driver or the fish hook. And the ski outfit, you emerge in, may take a little explaining.  

So let's think what are they giving you in first class to justify the price differential?  1. Space. They say air is free. Well, not on a plane. You pay for every extra bit of breathing room. 2. A wet hot shmata. They are really stretching there, looking for something to make you feel luxurious. No one knows what to do with it, first it’s too hot to touch and then it gets cold in a second. But, no one refuses it cause they paid heavily for it and they're going to get their monies worth. 3. A meal!!! Wow- Now this is certainly worth an arm and a leg. 4. A better bathroom ratio- you can never knock that. 5.  And then the coveted real reward, the ability to lie down. That's really what first class is all about. Oh yeah and free liquor!!  Now there's the mistake the airlines make.  

The free liquor should go to coach. That way no one would remember how miserably they slept. Or then again even if they couldn't sleep they’d be feeling happy anyway. That I think could be the solution to the dilemma of how to keep people from feeling miserable, folded up and bent in half, trying to find a place for their excess carry on, their body!  

Rivki Rosenwald is a certified relationship counselor, and career and life coach. She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivki@rosenwalds.com<mailto:rivki@rosenwalds.com

 

 

Why I Can’t Marry You 
by  
What are real deal breakers in a relationship?

 

What’s the greatest deal breaker when it comes to seeking a partner?

According to the Wall Street Journal, the biggest turn off for both women and men was “disheveled or unclean” followed closely by “lazy” and “too needy.”

A recent series of studies cited in the WSJ opens our eyes to what is happening in the minds of men and women as they contemplate possible relationships. People give more consideration to what’s wrong in a partner than to what is right. Granting more weight to deal breakers pushes people away from focusing on the positive qualities that they are hoping to find in a person.

Here is a list of other top deal breakers: no sense of humor, lacks confidence, talks too much or too little, and watches too much t.v./videogames. Women had more nonstarters and a sense of humor was more crucial. Men found “talks too much” to be a deal breaker and they preferred not to date a woman smarter than they are.

Where Do We Draw The Line?

How do you know if you’re being overly picky or not picky enough? Many singles are faced with these questions.

Of course we need to feel attraction. Relationships cannot be built while feeling repulsed. But I wonder how many singles are zeroing in on a negative, feeling overwhelmed, and not allowing themselves to see the positive in a future partner. This nature of directing our gaze to that which bothers us often blurs our vision. A wonderful person is struck from the list because we were not able to look past the way he dresses or how she does her hair. While people can update their clothing and redo their hair style, it is much more difficult to reshape character.

It is necessary to think about what really matters in life. What kind of person is this? What have you learned about his temper, his patience, her compassion and ability to listen when you speak? Is he able to turn off his iPhone and make time for you? Are they kind or judgmental to the people in their lives? Can they commit and be trusted when they take on a job or responsibility?

For husbands and wives reading this article, it is important to recognize that we, too, can get stuck on negatives like ‘a few extra pounds’ or ‘balding’ as years pass. Forgetting the positive qualities that brought us to love in the first place removes the appreciation we thought we would forever hold sacred within our hearts. Instead, we gripe, even look down with disdain, at our partners. The path to taking each other for granted is now cultivated. We begin to grow apart.

What Can You Do?

Those seeking a relationship should take notice of the little things that may be preventing them from creating a lasting relationship. Too many of these ‘deal breakers’ are ridiculously easy to remedy. There is no reason to go out being disheveled and unclean. Poor hygiene, stained clothing, and looking outdated can easily be focused on and fixed. Constantly checking your phone or sitting with a computer game instead of sharing thoughts does not nourish seeds of companionship that make romance grow. Why impede yourself from discovering your life partner because of lack of attention to how you present to others?

The same goes for husbands and wives. As years pass we begin to let ourselves go. Getting dressed up only for others, being personable for company, engaging friends while ignoring our partners are signs that we have begun to disconnect. Spouses need to feel that they are priority. Take a few moments and put yourself together. Brush your hair. Smile. Don’t lose your sense of humor. Get rid of the shabby and stained clothing you wear only in the house. Get off your laptop while speaking. We give messages of love by showing that we are interested in being here and that we want to give our best to our partners.

A Bunch of Zeroes

When asked “What are you looking for?” many people would give the same basic reply: “Good looking, very successful, smart, super sense of humor, loves to travel, and athletic.” My mother, Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis, would give the following advice:

“You have your list of six things you are looking for. Think of it as a bunch of zeroes. Now in front of those zeroes if you add a 1 you’ve got yourself 1,000,000. What’s the 1? It’s character. Kindness. Sensitivity. Good-heartedness. Without that, all you’re left with is a bunch of zeroes that equal nothing in life. After a while, a cruel person doesn’t look attractive to you, their sense of humor hurts you, their success breeds arrogance, you don’t care to travel with them because you feel miserable and so what that they’re athletic? Bottom line is good character. That’s number 1.”

Character is the deal breaker.

Let’s keep this in mind while looking for our soul mate. And if you are blessed to have found your match, be sure to take the time and revisit the goodness that brought you together in the first place. Your love is priceless.

 

Quick - I Need A Shower

Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS

So you have to prepare for the shower.  It doesn't hurt to make sure you have the supplies you need ready before the shower starts.  Of course you want to get some great smelling soaps and moisturizers. Certainly a nice new robe is especially yummy, with a monogram on it, ready to be used. And some bath size towels and washcloths make sense. Don't forget a nice soft pair of pajamas that would be so good to slip in to.

The question is, with all this preparation going on - how do people expect the bride to be surprised? Oh yeah someone else is making all the preparations for this shower. 

But seriously don't you think it would help if someone told the guests not to park right out in front of the house. How good a faker should a bride have to be.

There she stands mumbling "Oh, I'm so surprised. I had no idea."   Do you want her to have to seem like an awkward liar or a total dofus?  Seriously, how is she expected not to recognize her own mother's car- sitting right outside her friend’s house -a friend her mother never even met! At least tell people to park a block away.

Also- It's like a few weeks before the wedding. Is she really surprise-able? She's put a whole bunch of household items on a list at Bed Bath and Beyond. How does she think she's getting them?  No one's buying her a peeler or can opener for a wedding gift, are they?!

There are lots of gifts that have to be gotten before the wedding. So the shower is quite necessary. Basically to clean up taking care of the small items. The shower planners have to make sure to get some utensils and pots as well. Because, after weeks of dating and going out to restaurants nightly, real life is about to start. And the bride's been voted -chief chef. 

So there everyone sits with the “oooh’s” and “ah’s”, over blenders and food processors. The only other time these items get this much recognition is when advertisers are vying for the account. And here's some valuable shower advice - Don't even bother opening your mother in law's gifts. Whatever she got you -it is perfect!!! 

Then let's talk about this great new game they started playing at showers. They video the groom beforehand and see if he knows the answers to a series of personal questions the bride is asked. Everyone's watching the exchange!  Now tell me is this the right time to be asking him? I mean, like if he doesn't get any of the answers right is she suddenly going to trade him in? 

 

The food is probably as good as what they'll serve at the wedding. Because everyone contributed their best recipe and the price is certainly right. The only problem is no one wants to eat much cause everyone's trying to stay thin, so they can fit in to the size zero they got for the wedding.  Except for one smart aunt, who couldn't care less about size shmize. She is eating as much as she can, and wrapping the rest in her handy dandy roll of foil to take home to feed her family for the next few weeks. Probably right up until the wedding. 

Showers often have a theme. Life doesn't. 

Showers -you hope are a surprise. Life you hope isn't.

But as much as you try to plan out life -just about everything's turns out a surprise.....The kids you have, the way they act, where you actually wind up living!!!....  So don't feel too bad if your bride isn't surprised at the shower. She'll be dealing with surprises the rest of her life. Just do the best you can to make her a great party.  Cause after all, you have to admit, no one should go without a shower for too long!!! 

Rivki Rosenwald is a certified relationship counselor, and career and life coach. She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivki@rosenwalds.com<mailto:rivki@rosenwalds.com

 

 

Creating Security for Children in a Scary World 
by  
How to make a pocket of peace for our families and ourselves.

 

My daughter, Shaindy, traveled to America last week to visit with my mother. Upon returning to her home in Israel, Shaindy was greeted with a Welcome Home sign pasted onto her front door. Her six-year-old daughter had colored a picture of an El-Al plane, with a bright yellow sun. Behind the windows of the plane, she drew her mommy’s smiling face along with other passengers, and parallel to her mommy were the faces of terrorists, each with a fist raised holding sharp daggers.

Is this how our children see the world?

It’s not only in Israel that we must put ourselves into the shoes of frightened children. I spoke with a bat-mitzvah-aged girl who confided that she often feels scared. Many marriages around her are dissolving and she worries that one day she too will become a child of divorce. She watches friends deal with shaky finances, health issues, sick grandparents or siblings who seem out of control. “And the world is full of wars,” she added.

It can be overwhelming for children to deal with so much chaos, in addition to handling the pressures of school, friends and after school activities.

How can we keep our children grounded and maintain a positive outlook in life?

Many parents themselves are grappling with similar fears. How do we create a pocket of peace in a world gone mad?

Parental Peace

Before takeoff, flight attendants instruct you to put on your own oxygen mask first, begin to breathe and only then can you attempt to help your children.

The same holds true in life. We can only help our children deal with fears if we live with confidence that we can overcome obstacles. When children detect that parents are panicked, they grow fearful themselves. We must work on resolving our inner emotions of trepidation and never display hysteria. Parents who transmit a sense of calm despite the storm raging outside provide their children with serenity. Though this may not be easy for a parent undergoing distress, it is crucial that we strive to master self-control.

Husbands and wives in stressful situations should speak together privately and resolve to create a haven within their home. This means that we watch our tone, our language, and try hard to communicate patience and understanding. We don’t react in sharp tones or swat our loved ones aside with a dismissive word or gesture because of pressure.

Drawing upon one’s faith is also an anchor that provides our families with a sense of security in difficult times. When we reinforce our traditions, find solace in prayer, and commit to family rituals we are showing our children that we live with clear and established beliefs despite the turbulence that is taking place in our lives. It is not a matter of convenience, dependent on moods or feel-good emotions. Our faith is a bedrock of strength independent of turmoil and challenge. No matter how difficult the week has been my Shabbos candles bring light to my home. We are together, acquiring a sense of continuity and love. In a broken world we parents are here to heal.

Children’s Peace

When the world feels out of control a child’s sense of safety and trust is challenged. How can we help our children better cope? (Of course we are not speaking about phobias, anxiety, or childhood trauma which must be addressed professionally.)

Recognize that your child’s fear is real

Don’t ignore your child’s fears. Children become afraid at different ages, of different situations. Apprehension, worry, and feeling frightened are genuine concerns.

Validate the emotions

Allow your child to share his fears. Talk to him and permit him to communicate feelings.

Don’t make fun or belittle

A child shouldn’t feel as if he is bad or babyish for expressing worry. Be careful to avoid saying things like “a girl your age shouldn’t be afraid,” “that’s just silly,” or “stop being such a cry baby.” That only knocks your child’s self-esteem and prevents him from sharing in the future.

Don’t indulge a child’s fears

Show empathy but be careful not to fall apart each time your child tells you that he is afraid. When kids hear us talking about them and telling spouses and grandmothers that they are scared and anxious, we are adding drama to the situation. Find a balance between the emotions you display.

Teach coping strategies

Help your child work through the challenge. Positive self-statements like “I can do this” or “I will be ok” can help children navigate moments when they feel anxious. Some kids are empowered when they draw upon words of a prayer, others when they envision a happy memory. Some children who are afraid in the dark discover calm from a nightlight. Get to know your child and find the strategy that works for him.

Show empathy

Sharing stories of your own fears and how you overcame them can be an incredible source of comfort to a child.

Model being brave

Adults who lose it will raise children who lose it. Whether it is a fear of cockroaches, flying, blood tests, or unseen dangers from the world you live in, you cannot afford to freak out. Children who view their parents as in control feel secure in a world gone mad.

No matter how chaotic things get, our mission as parents is to guide, teach, and lead. Creating a pocket of peace will become part of your life-long legacy.

Our family thanks you for your continued prayers for my beloved mother, Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis, Esther bas Miriam.



 

Picture This

Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS                            

Oh my gosh look at this gorgeous little baby. That was her at one year old. Oh and look at her here eating ice cream -all over her face. She was about three there. But now I can't find her anywhere. Except on my cell phone! 

Remember those days of large picture albums? The hours of perusing old memories. The pictures you'd scream over...

-          “Seriously, did I really wear my hair like that? What was I thinking-or did I put my finger in a socket?"

-          “Did we really ever have a convertible sports car now look at us clunking around in a SUV!"

-          "Everyone thought she was a boy -We thought her hair would never grow in!” 

Today, I have bookcases full of albums but they kind of stop at the year 2005. After that it's almost like we cease to exist! 

 It was fun having those picture albums at a glance. Not that they don't take up plenty of space-They do!! Not that they don't fall apart. Not that they weren't a pain to put together. But they are accessible. And they are sharable, and pass-around-able. And best of all, you can see the pictures, even if you don't charge a battery! 

 And guess what -you can probably see some of those pictures even without hunting down your reading glasses- a torturous task!  And for Sabbath observers, who are forbidden to even touch their cell phones, the Sabbath was a great time to sit and look through old albums and bond with family or friends. Now families need to buy even more books and games to keep busy on the Sabbath. Let's just hope the kindle doesn't replace actual books and the industry continues to make board games!! 

And get this, though those picture albums could fade a bit, at least the pictures didn't disappear altogether, as it does on 'snapchat'. A moment captured a moment gone! 

I'll admit, that it's nice not to have to schlep you camera around and to still be able to capture an image. But half the time I'm on my phone when the opportunity arises so I wind up taking a picture of my ear. I have a whole series entitled my ear from every angle. If you'd like to see it I can send it to you. 

Also there was something fun about those adjustable lenses on those fancy cameras. You felt so professional turning them around and around and setting up the shot.  Now why would you bother? You can change it after the fact. You can change your eye color, crop off parts of the picture, or Photoshop it altogether! In fact I'm not even sure why people take pictures anymore. No one looks like themselves by the time they are done. 

And can we just discuss selfies?? People's arms are just not long enough for all the people that they try to stuff in to a "selfie". And no one really cares how they look or if the whole shot is distorted or just one eye or half their face got in cause -After all it's a selfie! Special distortive license exits there. 

The one good thing I can say about photography these days is that it's the one safe act of terrorism around. Everyone's photo bombing - but it's all in good fun! 

Rivki Rosenwald is a certified relationship counselor, and career and life coach. She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivki@rosenwalds.com<mailto:rivki@rosenwalds.com

 

 


FIVE TOWNS COMMUNITY WOMEN'S SHABBOS SHIUR

IN MEMORY OF YERACHMIEL MEIR BEN NISSIM AVRAHAM A”H

If you would like to speak, host or receive emails please contact:Chana Bienstock-569-4077-

Marcia Behar 374-0741-Chana Epstein- 295-2537 chanaeps@optonline.net

A Kesivah V’chasima Tova 5775/2014-15

 

SHIUR WILL BEGIN 4:15 p.m

Oct 10/27 Tishrei - Bereshis- Nelson and Marcia Behar, 460 Barnard Av. Ced  

Oct 17/4  Chesvan – Noach – Avrum and Miriam Wechter, 383 Church Ave., Ced

Oct 24/11 Chesvan- LechLecha-Jerry and Sharon Unger, 323 Derby Ave., Ced

Oct 31/18 Chesvan – Vayeira-Nechama Spiegel, 271 Oakwood Ave., Ced

SHIUR WILL BEGIN 3:15 p.m

Nov 7/25 Chesvan- Chayei Sara – Drs. Joe & Barbara Tucker 231 Henley Rd.,Woodmere

Nov 14/2 Kislev- Toldot- Dr. Noah and Rivkah Kromholz, 405 Oak Ave., Ced.

Nov 21/9 Kislev- Vayeitze-Rabbi Dr. Don and Hedi Well,  484 Argyle Road, Ced

Nov 28/16 Kislev- Vayishlach-Rabbi Tzvi and Malkie Nathan,421 Rugby Rd. Ced.

Dec 5/23  Kislev- Vayeshev Shimon and Suri Shamilzadeh,476A Bayview Av. Ced

Dec 12/30 Kislev CHANUKAH Mikeitz – Shalom & Bruchie Goldfeder, 469 Bayview, Ced

Dec 19/7 Teves – Vayigash-Stu and Tzippy Nussbaum, 508 Redwood Dr, Ced

Dec 26/14 Teves-Vayechi –Simcha and Chani Axelrod, 412 Church Ave., Ced

Jan 2/21 Teves- Shemot – Yesoshua & Sheri Zimmerman, 371 Washington Ave.,Ced

Jan 9/28 Teves– Vayeira – Gershon & Rochel Fruchter,473 W. Bdwy,Ced.

Jan 16/6 Shevat- -Bo- Menashe and Judy Greenberger, 386 Church Ave., Ced

Jan 23/13 Shvat– Beshalach-  Sydney and Debby Hoffert, 113 Elm St., Woodmere

Jan 30/20 Shvat- Yitro- Yossi and Elaine Farber, 333 Buckingham Ct, Ced

Feb 6/27 Shvat – Mishpatim- Yakov and  Suri Lewis, 356 Derby Avenue, Woodmere

Feb 13/4 Adar-I Terumah -.Dr. Steve and Joanne Levine, 385 Church Ave, Ced

Feb 20/11 Adar I- –Tetzaveh- Donny & Tamar Miller – 445 Oceanpoint Ave., Ced.

Feb 27/18 Adar I- KiTisa- Chaim & Reena Halbfinger – 324 Buckingham Rd.,Ced.

Mar 5/25 Adar I- - Vayachel- Chaim & Michelle Grosser – 386 Barnard Ave., Ced.

SHIUR WILL BEGIN 4:15 p.m

Mar 12/2 Adar II - Perkudei – Chuny & Chaya Ungar 293 Leroy Ave.,Ced.

March 19/9 Adar II- Vayikrah – Avi and Malkie Behar, 324 Carvel Ave., Ced

Mar 26/16 Adar II- Tzav- Uri & Rudi Schlachter – 348 Argyle Rd.,Ced.

April 2/23 Adar II- Shemini – Leon & Blima Porter – 43 Maple Ave.,Ced.

April 9/1 Nissan – Tazria – Aron & Rachel Solomon 370 Rugby Rd.,Ced.

April 16 Metzora Shabbat HaGadol – NO SHIUR Wishing you a kosher and fraylichen Pesach 

 


 

in memory of Malka Feiga bat Nosson 

Inspired by Tzipora Harris

 

 “Please G-d, let me partner with You and go beyond my constrictions to a place of expansiveness. Everything that happens is part of Your perfect training & development program for me. Help me respond in the most noble way- help me judge favorably, have compassion, let go of having to be in control and give it over to You, G-d. Please bless me with an amazing year of walking with YOU.”

1.      G-D, You have an incredible vision for all of humanity and for me. I want to fulfill Your vision of greatness for me more and more. Please show me what I most need to see gently.

2. I want to recognize the gifts in my life and see the totality of the life You gave me, the blessings and the challenges, as an expression of Your love. Please fill my heart with gratitude.

3. I want to transcend my greatest obstacles to fulfill Your vision for me. Please help me partner with You and go from a place of constraints to a place of expansiveness.

4. Please bless me with all the resources I need to fulfill Your vision for me. (health, clarity, relationships,  a job, place to live etc.)

5. I want to make You King by living myself more according to Your Definition of reality and Your instructions for living. Please guide me.

6. I resolve that I want to be connected to You, G-D, as the source of my wellbeing in life. And not rely on ANYTHING or ANYONE else. Please help me remember that no one else has power.

7. I resolve that this moment is the dawn of a new era in my life.

I stand before You, the Creator of the Universe, my loving Father, I look at the Rosh Hashanah prayer and of course I want to be connected to You as the source of all life, and be the beautiful person You created me to be; I definitely don’t want any of the mistaken choices of the past to stand in the way.  Please help me repair whatever needs fixing.  I want this year to be greater than any year I’ve ever had and I want to be a bigger person than I’ve ever been. Not just for my own sake but for the Jewish people and humanity. Please help me ask for the right things and help me understand Your loving answers.

I want today to be the dawn of a new era in my life.

G-d, You know what I’m facing inside and outside, please help me. “ 


 
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Ohel Sara Amen Group in memory of Sarit Marton a'h
 
The "Ohel Sara" Amen Group
in memory of Sarit Marton a'h
This week's shiurim and chabura schedule:
The "Ohel Sara" Amen Group
in memory of Sarit Marton a'h
 
cordially invites all women to attend our
  
Location:
2 Forest Lane
Lawrence, NY
Entrance on Broadway
 
There is no admission charge to attend any of our programs or shiurim
 

 

 
 

 

******************************************************

Esti Stahler

Parshat Tzav  http://youtu.be/KDz58ktZzY0

Parshat Vayishlach http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMNfGINtQxY

Parshat Lech Lichah  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YFPHu7maqgQ

Parshat Noach 2012 


 

Parshat Breishit 2012  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kLoPX3PjTsw&feature=youtu.be

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=ty4v_6dinqY, Parshat Nitzavim/Vayelech
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_Cvpa82Qfk  Parshat Naso

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vPvuLR0x_MM Parshat Behaalotchah

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-5-H8uWPlkE&feature=em-share_video_user Parshat Shlach


 

 

Rabbi Eytan Feiner
http://www.s213209882.onlinehome.us/REF_17_Tamuz.mp3
http://www.s213209882.onlinehome.us/REF_Matos.mp3
http://www.s213209882.onlinehome.us/REF_Bhaaloscha.mp3
Rav Meir Goldvicht
http://www.s213209882.onlinehome.us/B'halotcha.mp3 http://www.s213209882.onlinehome.us/B'halotcha.pdf
http://www.s213209882.onlinehome.us/Goldvicht_Naso.mp3
http://www.s213209882.onlinehome.us/Goldvicht_Naso.pdf
 
Shira Smiles
http://download.613.org/smiles/videos/5768-9-43-matos -massey-the-grand-scheme.mp3
http://download.613.org/smiles/videos/5768-9-39-shelach769.mp3
http://download.613.org/smiles/videos/5768-9-38-behaaloscha
-comprehending-the-complaints.mp3
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Past Shiurim at Ohel Sara Amen Group
Second Anniversary Program 2007
Rabbi Dovid Weinberger on Sarit Marton's Yahrtzeit Dedication:
Midos, December 4, 2007

Rabbi Nissel on Tefilah, November 2007 Topic
Rebbetzin Shira Smiles, December 2007 Topic
Debbie Greenblatt, Michtav M'Eliyahu: Midat Harachamim, October 15, 2007
Debbie Greenblatt, Michtav M'Eliyahu: Midat Harachamim, October 22, 2007
Debbie Greenblatt, Michtav M'Eliyahu: Midat Harachamim, October 31, 2007
Esther Wein and Rachel Baron: Chahashemesh L'Yaakov, July 31, 2006
Esther Wein Musaf Rosh Hashanah September 6, 2006
Rabbi Mordechai Sitorsky September 2006
Rabbi Mordechai Sitorsky on Rosh Chodesh Tammuz, June 26, 2006
Rebbetzin Sara Meisels Rosh Chodesh Elul Divrei Bracha 2006
Rebbetzin Abbey Lerner Rosh Chodesh Iyar 2006
Rabbi Dovid Weinberger on thefirst of Chanukah 2007presenting the Sefer Middos
2nd Anniversary of the "Ohel Sara" Amen Group
Rebbetzin Judy Young a'h speaking at a Rosh Chodesh Elulprogram in Great Neck
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Mitzvah Blessings

Sundays only at 8:15am at 386 Felter Avenue, Hewlett.
Women gather to recite and hear at least 100 morning blessings so as to fulfill the mitzvah of doing so. If you know of someone who is ill, please feel free to call and provide the group with the Hebrew name, so that those who are present may pray for him or her. Haidee Blumenthal (516)295-5431

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Beryl Wein
Beryl Wein - Click here for this Week's Parshah
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Local Mikvehs
Congregation Mikveh of South Shore, 1156 Peninsula Boulevard, Hewlett (516)569-5514
Hebrew Community Service Mikvah, 1121 Sage Street, Far Rockaway (718)327-9727
For Jewish Holidays Only: Aish Kodesh Mikvah. Woodmere Boulevard in Woodmere. Speak with Sandy Polansky to make a reservation. (516)459-2298
Congregation Bais Medrash. 504 West Broadway, Cedarhurst. Speak with Rebbetzin Spiegel(516)569-1971
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Library
Hewlett Woodmere Library - 1125 Broadway, Hewlett 516-374-1967
Peninsula Public Library - 280 Central Avenue, Lawrence 516-239-3262 l www.peninsulapublic.org
 
Children's Movies: Sunday at 2:00pm
Story Time: Mondays at 4:15 pm (3-5 Year Olds) - a half hour program of stories and a short film.
Book Discussions: Tuesdays at 6:30 pm (Grades 4 - 7)
Registration - January 12
Program: February 10
The Theif Lord By: Cornelia Funke
Registration - February 9
Program: March 24
To Be Announced
Toddler Time: Thursdays at 10:30am (24 - 35 months) - A lively half-hour of songs, stories, fingerplays, movement and a short film for a child accompanied by an adult.
Mother Goose: Fridays at 10:00 am (12-23 months) - Programs of songs, finger plays, nursery rhymes and board books for very young readers accompanied by a parent or caregiver.
Parent-Child Workshop: Thursdays at 10:00-11:15 (12-35 months)
A special program that encourages parents to play, sing and do finger plays with their children. Specialists in the fields of Speech and Hearing, Behavior and Development, Nutrition, and Dance/Movement are available at various sessions. Registration is required and is being accepted in the children's room.
Book Talking with Arnold Rosenbaum: Wednesdays at 1:00pm
The Defining Moment - FDR's First Hundred Days and the Triumph of Hope by Jonathan Alter. January 31
Economic Problems Facing the Middle Class .Mr. Rosenbaum will present his thoughts on the socioeconomic problems facing the American middle class. March 14
If Music Be The Food of Love...Shakespeare In Love: Sunday, January 7 at 2:30pm. New York jazz vocalist Christiana Drapkin celebrates the beauty and power of William Shakespeare's poetry and presents it in lively, sometimes haunting, jazz arrangements. The songs are direct quotations from Shakespeare's plays. Tickets required.
Picasso and American Art: Monday, January 8 at 1:00 pm. Picasso is acknowledged by many as the central figure of the modern movement. Art historian Mary Vahey will examine the sometimes worshipful, sometimes testy relationship between American artists and the Picasso, the immensely inventive Spaniard.
A Rockette Remembers: Wednesday, January 17 at 1:00pm. Corliss Whitney, the honorary historian of the Rockette Alumnae, shares poignant stories about her years as a Rockette during the 40's and 50's.
Laugh Your Way to Health - Humor Therapy: Wednesday, January 24 at 1:00pm. A presentation that will focus on the latest studies that scientifically prove and explain how and why laughter IS the best medicine.
Berman Does Merman: Sunday February 4 at 2:30pm. Songs and stories celebrating Ethel Mermans brilliant career will be brought to PPL by vocalist Lisa Berman. Tickets required.
India...Exotic and Ancient Land of Contrasts: Thursday, February 8 at 1:00pm. Through lecture and slides, Sally Wendkos Olds will guide you on a journey to another world of exotic beauty and ancient splendor.
Great Lyricists and/or Poets: Wednesday, February 14 at 1:00pm. Arnie Rosenbaum will share the poetic lyrics of Ira Gershwin, Alan J. Lerner and Larry Hart. You decide if the great lyricists of the 20th century really were master poets.
Louis Comfort Tiffany and Laurelton Hall - An Artists Country Estate: Monday, March 19 at 1:00pm. Ines Powell, Metropolitan Museum of Art educator, will present an illustrated lecture which will bring together many of the architectural elements and design features of Tiffany's extraordinary country estate in Oyster Bay.
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