So you have to prepare for
the shower. It doesn't hurt to make sure you
have the supplies you need ready before the
shower starts. Of course you want to get some
great smelling soaps and moisturizers. Certainly
a nice new robe is especially yummy, with a
monogram on it, ready to be used. And some bath
size towels and washcloths make sense. Don't
forget a nice soft pair of pajamas that would be
so good to slip in to.
The question is, with all
this preparation going on - how do people expect
the bride to be surprised? Oh yeah someone else
is making all the preparations for this shower.
But seriously don't you
think it would help if someone told the guests
not to park right out in front of the house. How
good a faker should a bride have to be.
There she stands mumbling
"Oh, I'm so surprised. I had no idea." Do you
want her to have to seem like an awkward liar or
a total dofus? Seriously, how is she expected
not to recognize her own mother's car- sitting
right outside her friend’s house -a friend her
mother never even met! At least tell people to
park a block away.
Also- It's like a few weeks
before the wedding. Is she really surprise-able?
She's put a whole bunch of household items on a
list at Bed Bath and Beyond. How does she think
she's getting them? No one's buying her a
peeler or can opener for a wedding gift, are
There are lots of gifts
that have to be gotten before the wedding. So
the shower is quite necessary. Basically to
clean up taking care of the small items. The
shower planners have to make sure to get some
utensils and pots as well. Because, after weeks
of dating and going out to restaurants nightly,
real life is about to start. And the bride's
been voted -chief chef.
So there everyone sits with
the “oooh’s” and “ah’s”, over blenders and food
processors. The only other time these items get
this much recognition is when advertisers are
vying for the account. And here's some valuable
shower advice - Don't even bother opening your
mother in law's gifts. Whatever she got you -it
Then let's talk about this
great new game they started playing at showers.
They video the groom beforehand and see if he
knows the answers to a series of personal
questions the bride is asked. Everyone's
watching the exchange! Now tell me is this the
right time to be asking him? I mean, like if he
doesn't get any of the answers right is she
suddenly going to trade him in?
The food is probably as
good as what they'll serve at the wedding.
Because everyone contributed their best recipe
and the price is certainly right. The only
problem is no one wants to eat much cause
everyone's trying to stay thin, so they can fit
in to the size zero they got for the wedding.
Except for one smart aunt, who couldn't care
less about size shmize. She is eating as much as
she can, and wrapping the rest in her handy
dandy roll of foil to take home to feed her
family for the next few weeks. Probably right up
until the wedding.
Showers often have a theme.
Showers -you hope are a
surprise. Life you hope isn't.
But as much as you try to
plan out life -just about everything's turns out
a surprise.....The kids you have, the way they
act, where you actually wind up living!!!....
So don't feel too bad if your bride isn't
surprised at the shower. She'll be dealing with
surprises the rest of her life. Just do the best
you can to make her a great party. Cause after
all, you have to admit, no one should go without
a shower for too long!!!
Creating Security for Children in a Scary World
How to make a pocket of peace for our families
My daughter, Shaindy, traveled to America
last week to visit with my mother. Upon
returning to her home in Israel, Shaindy was
greeted with a Welcome Home sign pasted onto
her front door. Her six-year-old daughter
had colored a picture of an El-Al plane,
with a bright yellow sun. Behind the windows
of the plane, she drew her mommy’s smiling
face along with other passengers, and
parallel to her mommy were the faces of
terrorists, each with a fist raised holding
Is this how our children
see the world?
It’s not only in Israel that we must put
ourselves into the shoes of frightened
children. I spoke with a bat-mitzvah-aged
girl who confided that she often feels
scared. Many marriages around her are
dissolving and she worries that one day she
too will become a child of divorce. She
watches friends deal with shaky finances,
health issues, sick grandparents or siblings
who seem out of control. “And the world is
full of wars,” she added.
It can be overwhelming for children to
deal with so much chaos, in addition to
handling the pressures of school, friends
and after school activities.
How can we keep our children grounded and
maintain a positive outlook in life?
Many parents themselves are grappling
with similar fears. How do we create a
pocket of peace in a world gone mad?
Before takeoff, flight attendants
instruct you to put on your own oxygen mask
first, begin to breathe and only then can
you attempt to help your children.
The same holds true in life. We can only
help our children deal with fears if we live
with confidence that we can overcome
obstacles. When children detect that parents
are panicked, they grow fearful themselves.
We must work on resolving our inner emotions
of trepidation and never display hysteria.
Parents who transmit a sense of calm despite
the storm raging outside provide their
children with serenity. Though this may not
be easy for a parent undergoing distress, it
is crucial that we strive to master
Husbands and wives in stressful
situations should speak together privately
and resolve to create a haven within their
home. This means that we watch our tone, our
language, and try hard to communicate
patience and understanding. We don’t react
in sharp tones or swat our loved ones aside
with a dismissive word or gesture because of
Drawing upon one’s faith is also an
anchor that provides our families with a
sense of security in difficult times. When
we reinforce our traditions, find solace in
prayer, and commit to family rituals we are
showing our children that we live with clear
and established beliefs despite the
turbulence that is taking place in our
lives. It is not a matter of convenience,
dependent on moods or feel-good emotions.
Our faith is a bedrock of strength
independent of turmoil and challenge. No
matter how difficult the week has been my
Shabbos candles bring light to my home. We
are together, acquiring a sense of
continuity and love. In a broken world we
parents are here to heal.
When the world feels out of control a
child’s sense of safety and trust is
challenged. How can we help our children
better cope? (Of course we are not speaking
about phobias, anxiety, or childhood trauma
which must be addressed professionally.)
Recognize that your child’s fear is
Don’t ignore your child’s fears. Children
become afraid at different ages, of
different situations. Apprehension, worry,
and feeling frightened are genuine concerns.
Validate the emotions
Allow your child to share his fears. Talk
to him and permit him to communicate
Don’t make fun or belittle
A child shouldn’t feel as if he is bad or
babyish for expressing worry. Be careful to
avoid saying things like “a girl your age
shouldn’t be afraid,” “that’s just silly,”
or “stop being such a cry baby.” That only
knocks your child’s self-esteem and prevents
him from sharing in the future.
Don’t indulge a child’s fears
Show empathy but be careful not to fall
apart each time your child tells you that he
is afraid. When kids hear us talking about
them and telling spouses and grandmothers
that they are scared and anxious, we are
adding drama to the situation. Find a
balance between the emotions you display.
Teach coping strategies
Help your child work through the
challenge. Positive self-statements like “I
can do this” or “I will be ok” can help
children navigate moments when they feel
anxious. Some kids are empowered when they
draw upon words of a prayer, others when
they envision a happy memory. Some children
who are afraid in the dark discover calm
from a nightlight. Get to know your child
and find the strategy that works for him.
Sharing stories of your own fears and how
you overcame them can be an incredible
source of comfort to a child.
Model being brave
Adults who lose it will raise children
who lose it. Whether it is a fear of
cockroaches, flying, blood tests, or unseen
dangers from the world you live in, you
cannot afford to freak out. Children who
view their parents as in control feel secure
in a world gone mad.
No matter how chaotic things get, our
mission as parents is to guide, teach, and
lead. Creating a pocket of peace will become
part of your life-long legacy.
Our family thanks you for your
continued prayers for my beloved mother,
Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis, Esther bas
Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS
Oh my gosh look at this
gorgeous little baby. That was her at one year
old. Oh and look at her here eating ice cream
-all over her face. She was about three there.
But now I can't find her anywhere. Except on my
Remember those days of
large picture albums? The hours of perusing old
memories. The pictures you'd scream over...
-“Seriously, did I really wear my hair
like that? What was I thinking-or did I put my
finger in a socket?"
-“Did we really ever have a convertible
sports car now look at us clunking around in a
-"Everyone thought she was a boy -We
thought her hair would never grow in!”
Today, I have bookcases
full of albums but they kind of stop at the year
2005. After that it's almost like we cease to
It was fun having those
picture albums at a glance. Not that they don't
take up plenty of space-They do!! Not that they
don't fall apart. Not that they weren't a pain
to put together. But they are accessible. And
they are sharable, and pass-around-able. And
best of all, you can see the pictures, even if
you don't charge a battery!
And guess what -you can
probably see some of those pictures even without
hunting down your reading glasses- a torturous
task! And for Sabbath observers, who are
forbidden to even touch their cell phones, the
Sabbath was a great time to sit and look through
old albums and bond with family or friends. Now
families need to buy even more books and games
to keep busy on the Sabbath. Let's just hope the
kindle doesn't replace actual books and the
industry continues to make board games!!
And get this, though
those picture albums could fade a bit, at least
the pictures didn't disappear altogether, as it
does on 'snapchat'. A moment captured a moment
I'll admit, that it's
nice not to have to schlep you camera around and
to still be able to capture an image. But half
the time I'm on my phone when the opportunity
arises so I wind up taking a picture of my ear.
I have a whole series entitled my ear from every
angle. If you'd like to see it I can send it to
Also there was something
fun about those adjustable lenses on those fancy
cameras. You felt so professional turning them
around and around and setting up the shot. Now
why would you bother? You can change it after
the fact. You can change your eye color, crop
off parts of the picture, or Photoshop it
altogether! In fact I'm not even sure why people
take pictures anymore. No one looks like
themselves by the time they are done.
And can we just discuss
selfies?? People's arms are just not long enough
for all the people that they try to stuff in to
a "selfie". And no one really cares how they
look or if the whole shot is distorted or just
one eye or half their face got in cause -After
all it's a selfie! Special distortive license
The one good thing I can
say about photography these days is that it's
the one safe act of terrorism around. Everyone's
photo bombing - but it's all in good fun!
April 16 Metzora Shabbat HaGadol – NO SHIUR Wishing you a kosher and fraylichen Pesach
in memory of Malka Feiga bat Nosson
“Please G-d, let me partner with You
and go beyond my constrictions to a
place of expansiveness. Everything that
happens is part of Your perfect training
& development program for me. Help me
respond in the most noble way- help me
judge favorably, have compassion, let go
of having to be in control and give it
over to You, G-d. Please bless me with
an amazing year of walking with YOU.”
1. G-D, You have an incredible
vision for all of humanity and for me. I
want to fulfill Your vision of greatness
for me more and more. Please show me
what I most need to see gently.
2. I want to recognize the gifts in
my life and see the totality of the life
You gave me, the blessings and the
challenges, as an expression of Your
love. Please fill my heart with
3. I want to transcend my greatest
obstacles to fulfill Your vision for me.
Please help me partner with You and go
from a place of constraints to a place
4. Please bless me with all the
resources I need to fulfill Your vision
for me. (health, clarity,
relationships, a job, place to live
5. I want to make You King by living
myself more according to Your Definition
of reality and Your instructions for
living. Please guide me.
6. I resolve that I want to be
connected to You, G-D, as the source of
my wellbeing in life. And not rely on
ANYTHING or ANYONE else. Please help me
remember that no one else has power.
7. I resolve that this moment is the
dawn of a new era in my life.
I stand before You, the Creator of
the Universe, my loving Father, I look
at the Rosh Hashanah prayer and of
course I want to be connected to You as
the source of all life, and be the
beautiful person You created me to be; I
definitely don’t want any of the
mistaken choices of the past to stand in
the way. Please help me repair whatever
needs fixing. I want this year to be
greater than any year I’ve ever had and
I want to be a bigger person than I’ve
ever been. Not just for my own sake but
for the Jewish people and humanity.
Please help me ask for the right things
and help me understand Your loving
I want today to be the dawn of a new
era in my life.
G-d, You know what I’m facing inside and
outside, please help me. “
Sundays only at 8:15am at 386 Felter Avenue,
Women gather to recite and hear at least 100
morning blessings so as to fulfill the mitzvah
of doing so. If you know of someone who is ill,
please feel free to call and provide the group
with the Hebrew name, so that those who are
present may pray for him or her. Haidee
Mondays at 4:15
pm (3-5 Year Olds) - a half hour
program of stories and a short
Tuesdays at 6:30 pm (Grades 4
- 7) Registration
- January 12 Program:
February 10 The
Theif Lord By: Cornelia
- February 9 Program:
To Be Announced
Time: Thursdays at 10:30am
(24 - 35 months) - A lively half-hour
of songs, stories, fingerplays,
movement and a short film for
a child accompanied by an adult.
Fridays at 10:00
am (12-23 months) - Programs of
songs, finger plays, nursery rhymes
and board books for very young
readers accompanied by a parent
Workshop: Thursdays at
10:00-11:15 (12-35 months)
A special program that encourages
parents to play, sing and do finger
plays with their children. Specialists
in the fields of Speech and Hearing,
Behavior and Development, Nutrition,
and Dance/Movement are available
at various sessions. Registration
is required and is being accepted
in the children's room.
with Arnold Rosenbaum:
Wednesdays at 1:00pm
The Defining Moment - FDR's First
Hundred Days and the Triumph of
Hope by Jonathan Alter. January
Economic Problems Facing the Middle
Class .Mr. Rosenbaum will present
his thoughts on the socioeconomic
problems facing the American middle
class. March 14
Be The Food of Love...Shakespeare
In Love: Sunday, January
7 at 2:30pm. New York jazz vocalist
Christiana Drapkin celebrates
the beauty and power of William
Shakespeare's poetry and presents
it in lively, sometimes haunting,
jazz arrangements. The songs are
direct quotations from Shakespeare's
plays. Tickets required.
and American Art:
January 8 at 1:00 pm. Picasso
is acknowledged by many as the
central figure of the modern movement.
Art historian Mary Vahey will
examine the sometimes worshipful,
sometimes testy relationship between
American artists and the Picasso,
the immensely inventive Spaniard.
January 17 at 1:00pm. Corliss
Whitney, the honorary historian
of the Rockette Alumnae, shares
poignant stories about her years
as a Rockette during the 40's
Way to Health - Humor
Therapy: Wednesday, January 24
at 1:00pm. A presentation that
will focus on the latest studies
that scientifically prove and
explain how and why laughter IS
the best medicine.
Does Merman: Sunday February
4 at 2:30pm. Songs and stories
celebrating Ethel Mermans brilliant
career will be brought to PPL
by vocalist Lisa Berman. Tickets
and Ancient Land of Contrasts:
Thursday, February 8 at 1:00pm.
Through lecture and slides, Sally
Wendkos Olds will guide you on
a journey to another world of
exotic beauty and ancient splendor.
and/or Poets: Wednesday,
February 14 at 1:00pm. Arnie Rosenbaum
will share the poetic lyrics of
Ira Gershwin, Alan J. Lerner and
Larry Hart. You decide if the
great lyricists of the 20th century
really were master poets.
Tiffany and Laurelton Hall
An Artists Country Estate: Monday,
March 19 at 1:00pm. Ines Powell,
Metropolitan Museum of Art educator,
will present an illustrated lecture
which will bring together many
of the architectural elements
and design features of Tiffany's
extraordinary country estate in
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